“It’s January…let’s punish ourselves!” said nobody ever...
...and yet, that is exactly what we do.
In a culture that pushes extreme dieting and exercise regimes as soon as the clock moves to 00:01am on New Years Day, we increasingly berate ourselves for the excesses of the Christmas season, and resolve to be better, fitter, slimmer, stronger versions of ourselves. I wonder though, what might happen if we were to go against the tide, and decided to show some gentleness instead?
In his 2020 article[1], Perry Glanzer noted that the use of the word gentle was at its lowest point for over 300 years, and that Microsoft Word suggested changing the word “gentlemen” to just “men” or “people”. Based on these trends, he suggests that our modern society no longer has a place for gentleness.
Arguably, now more than ever, society needs to remember gentleness as a core Christian virtue. On a global level, we are confronted with power hungry leaders who push us ever closer to war and on a local level, we see the power of social media and doom-scrolling encouraging us to continually compare ourselves and live in competition for the next must-have item.
Gentleness should not be confused with timidity. In the gospels, gentleness is a virtue specifically attributed to Jesus, and yet no one would describe the table-flipping in the temple as timid. Again, Glanzer suggests that “gentleness comes from a strong faith in which one trusts God for the outcome and does not need to use what appears to be effective but is really not- cowering in a corner or using brash or powerful tactics that are meant to intimidate with power.”[2]
We have heard in our January sermons to clothe ourselves in gentleness (Colossians 3:12) but what should that look like? How do we start to practise a gentleness that may inspire others? Remembering how Jesus treated those on the edges of society, such as the Samaritan woman in John 4:41-42 is one way to understand the power in gentleness.
Personally, I have decided that I need to learn how to be gentle to myself, in order to understand what it means to be truly gentle with others, I have abandoned the idea of punishing resolutions, instead challenging myself to be gentle and look for the joy in the everyday, and I would actively encourage you to do the same. Only in practising a gentleness to ourselves can we start to understand what it means to be gentle with others, and hope to inspire a new place for gentleness in society today.
[1] https://christianscholars.com/the-demise-of-gentleness/#:~:text=Gentleness%20is%20the%20sensitivity%20and,29%3A21%3A5).
[2] As above
Lesley Hurst is part of St. Andrew's Church family
and the Director of Education for Chichester Diocese
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